Don't You Remember ~

When will I see you again?
You left with no goodbye,
Not a single word was said,
No final kiss to seal any scene,
I had no idea of the state we were in,


I know I have a fickle heart and a bitterness,
And a wandering eye, and heaviness in my head,


But don't you remember?
Don't you remember?
The reason you loved me before,
Baby, please remember me once more,


When was the last time you thought of me?
Or have you completely erased me from your memory?
I often think about where I went wrong,
The more I do, the less I know,


But I know I have a fickle heart and a bitterness,
And a wandering eye, and a heaviness in my head,


But don't you remember?
Don't you remember?
The reason you loved me before,
Baby, please remember me once more,


Gave you the space so you could breathe,
I kept my distance so you would be free,
And hoped that you'd find the missing piece,
To bring you back to me,


Why don't you remember?
Don't you remember?
The reason you loved me before,
Baby, please remember me once more,


When will I see you again?

I'm Nothing guys .

Nothing much to say guys . Im the new one in that group . So , I the one should shut up and listens . Its really upset if aku ta dapat join in that conservation . Yaa . Terase sangat jauh hati . Bcoz , im not like you guys . Thats why I should stayed silent . Its not because my stomach pain or im not in my mood . Its really an awkward moment . What to do . I just sit silently and listen .

You owe me .

I really need u . Just u . No others . I hope u understand . Betul, masa kau untuk aku sekarang semakin berkurangan . Kau sangat dari kau yang dulu . Sangat . Kenapa ? Izit aku ada buat salah . If yess, im sorry . Do forgive me . Mungkin salah aku . Aku cuba perbaiki diri aku sendiri, tapa kalau kau ta nampak . Aku ta salah kan kau tapi aku tahu kau dapat rasa . Tolong hargai . Aku ta minta yang lain da . Swear to GOD aku nak kau yang dulu . Bukan aku ta suka dengan kau yang sekarang , tapi aku lagi selesa dengan kau yang dulu . Yang sentiasa ada bila aku nak . Aku tahu perubahan kau mengikut masa dan keadaan . Aku ta paksa kau berubah mengikut kehendak aku . Tapi aku ta tahu sampai bila aku boleh sabar . Bukan aku da penat, tapi aku sendiri ta boleh predict diri aku . Aku ta nak berubah, aku ta nak benci kau sebab aku sayang kau . Perlu ke aku buat macam tuh sedangkan kita boleh baikkan keadaan asalkan kita sanggup . Kita masih mampu baikkan semua . Aku ta nak nanti benda macam nie jadi teruk . Please . I just need your time . Spend your time with me while im still here . Hati manusia boleh berubahkan . Bila bila masa dia nak, even a second pown dia akan berubah . Sebab dia ta ikhlas buat sesuatu sebab tuh dia mudah untuk buat benda yang lain dan lupakan yang lama . One day u may realize u have lost the moon while counting the stars :)

Part of me :)

Part of me will always love you .
Not as before but will always there . 
But its okay , because i let you go a long time ago . 
I hope you'll have a great life . I know you will . 
Some things are just never meant to be , no matter how much we wish they are . 
It maybe always true for me , but in your eyes it always wrong .
I make a decision that im going to move on .
It wont happen automatically . 
I have to rise up and say , i dont care how hard this is, i dont care how disappointed i am . 
Im not going to let this get the best of me . 
Im moving on with my life . 
I cant look back, i just have to put the past behind me and find something better in my future . 
People changes and heart move on my dear . 
You cant changed what has already happened so dont waste your time thinking about it . 
Six letter, two words, easy to say, hard to explain, harder to do but i did it .MOVE ON. Thank you to him . Always there for me .

Thanks Benny :)

Dear heart,
        I made mistakes , i've changed , i always blame the person that i love the most . I know he love me no matter what happen . I know he never change , its me . Always been my side actually Ben , not you. Im sorry for everything . I do love you too . I'll never step away from your side because doing that same like i kill myself Ben , sama macam aku menolak apa yang Tuhan tuh da tentukan untuk aku . Kalau selalu cuba yang terbaik dan selalu bagi yang terbaik , just aku yang ta pandai nak appreciate Ben . Give me time too Ben to change myself because i really love our relationship . For God sake Ben , i love damn much Ben . Only God know . Aku selalu mengharap pada kau tapi aku sendiri ta pernah nak tahu kesalahan diri . I will try my best Ben . For you . :)

Pergi.

Don't ever expect life to be fair only for you . Kita manusia biasa . Aku bukan bodoh, banggang , malaikat , orang yang ta patut dipercaya, orang yang patut dipulaukan , cakap putar belit , perempuan ta da maruah , aku bukan penipu dan aku jugakk bukan penakut . Kau siapa nak kata aku macam tuh ? Sedar diri sikit . Kau ta sesempurna mana pown . Kau malaikat ke ? Ta semua malaikat tuh baik . Jangan jadi orang yang ta mengenang budi . Jangan hidup jadi kurang diajar . Cakap jangan sebarang cakap . Kau move on, jangan libatkan aku . Move on sorang sorang sebab aku ta hingin nak ada dalam sejarah hidup kau . Sebab aku ta kenal lelaki yang ta reti hormat perempuan macam kau . Jangan kaitkan hal nie dengan agama kalau diri sendiri masih jahil . Aku ta pernah bangga diri yang aku nie ta pernah ada salah pown dengan kau . Aku mengaku salah aku lagi banyak tapi aku buat something , aku make one decision to step away from your life . So that aku ta buat salah lagi dengan kau . Kenapa tuli kan hati dan mata kau untuk tengok semua tuh ? Cakap banyak pown da ta guna . Buang masa . Jangan berhubung dengan family aku lagi . Especially kakak aku . Jangan kaitkan dia dalam hal nie . Jangan ganggu hidup aku sebab aku ta pernah kenal kau . Kau bukan siapa siapa bagi aku sebab kau kenangan yang aku nak padam . You are the stain that i want to erase . Remember this words dude "what goes around comes around" . Ayat yang kau selau guna . Karma tuh selalu adil . One day kau akan rasa balik , every harsh words yang kau cakap dekat aku . Baik cepat atau lambat kau akan rasa . Live your life happily . Jangan ganggu hidup aku seperti mana aku ta pernah ganggu hidup kau . All our memories da lama aku buang . Harap kau paham . 

:)

Puas hati kau ? 

Move on..

Move on ? Yaa, i already did that . Not because of you and also not because him . It is all because me, myself . I wanted to be that girl . I wanted to be free as much as I can . I want to have a life without you . Frankly, I dont want to care about you anymore . Sorry for the harsh words but I dont give a damn about that . You can , I can but why now ? I did it straight away after I left you . Well anyway, thank you for that . Wish for your happiness with your loves one . :) chill dude .  

Sigh~

Uhhh , da lama ta tulis blog . Haha . Nie pown mencuri masa sekejap . Rasanya ta lambat lagi nak wish Happy New Year and Happy Chinese New Year . So Gong xi gong xi . Unfortunately , this year ta berape nak happy because of assignment yang bergunung ganang banyaknya . I think this semester is going to kill me with those assignment . But kena siapkan jugakk . Kalau ta markah ta payah la kan . Senang cerita . Yahh , im lazy but i think the most lazy person is my friends . Haha . (Syhhh , keep it secret) . To compared between me and her , im quite okay dude . Haha . Im tired , really tired . Yaa laa , all of the assignment aku yang buat . Nak harapkan group ? Uhh , memang terkubur laa jawabnya . Jangan kata nak buat, nak sentuh pown belum tentu lagi taww . I don't mind , but at least share your opinion . Jangan harapkan aku sorang . Markah nak, buat ta nak . Lolx . Naik kematu burit aku menghadap lappy nie lelama . Nasib laa kau nie penyabar orangnya , kalau ta dengan kau kau sekali aku masukkan dalam presentation nie kang . Kbai . 

Truthfully , im tired .

Who knows . The more I try , the less its working . I try to avoid but yet the things keep going on happen . There's always a mistakes that I have made . Whats wrong with me ? Whats wrong with myself ? Dont I good enough to cherish your day ? I try my best & give the best but people keep going on find my mistake . What i have done ? Eventhough , your attitude break me to pieces , I forgive you . I dont even hate you my dear friend . Because its hard for me to find a friend or to be friendly but once I get . I really take a good care of it . Never cross in my mind to let it go easily or to make you as my enemy . Please , at least understand me . How many times I need to tell you . To be frank , I dont really mind actually but I dont want to ruin everything simply like that . Dont you take it seriously ? What ever it is you're still my friend . Dont you try to avoid the thing that you go through everyday . For me , its okay if you want to respect my relationship with him . But , why so sudden ? Slowly , you're running from us . I know whats wrong with you actually but I dont want to tell you the thing that will make others knw too . Its just between you & me . How you define your friendship ? I trust you . Dont simply break that trust because once you break , you'll feel useless when you try to gain it back . I dont even care what others talk about you . Because the thing is between them & you . Not you & me . I do appreciate my friendship but its just wasting my time because you doesnt show your appreciation at all . Its too expensive to tell the world how damn much you're really care about your friend . You might not see , the inner me , once you see dont you dare to ask why because there's no use to tell you . You'll regret it someday somehow because when I was there for you , you closed your eyes but when you open your eyes , I already disppear & I know that I doesnt important to you at all . So better , I walk away rather than think that you does not care about me . Sorry to says it out , but truthfully im tired already . Tired with all the poker face that appear on your face , tired with your fake attitude , tired to try to win your heart , tired to tell the world alone how wonderful is my friendship matter . 

Morningmare !

I should pronoun it as nightmare actually . But aku mimpi pagi so I pronoun it as morningmare . Not that bad actually but the most i scared is that . A lot of things happened to me for these few days . But all in all , i'm still here . Breathing like usual , talking like the normal Suzy , smiling and laughing to make my love one and friends happy with me , even though i'm hurting deep inside . I dont really mind at all for what i saw and for what they do behind me . Dont mind doesn't mean that u dont care at all . Its just sooner or later u will realize it . Without me by your side , u'll think further away .  I'll always here and there for u . I'll not mad for that kind of matter . Pengalaman mematangkan aku . I regret that i make u felt upset . I regret that i'm the one that always cried for one reason . I dont want to . But i just want to let u knw . Your pride , your dignity is my priority . I'm sorry for all the mistakes i have been to u . I dont want people talk bad about u because i knw who u're . They dont even knw our story . I knw she's your bestfriend , u knw her first rather than me , she knw evrything about u . But at least , she should show some respect dude ! What if i do the same ?? I love my friendship , even the things they do is hurting me , i will never talk about that infront of them . Let the flow go away . Like i have been said on my previous post " to forget something easily is a gift from God" . Yeahh , i knw that . U look at me that time , but still u ignore it and u just carry on with him . What kind of friend is that ?? I'm not mad . I swear , i dont even hate u . Because evryone that related to me is precious . Do respect me like how i respect u . Dont try to challenge me Because im not a fighter . I'm not scared , just i dont want to ruin evrything that i have been thru together . Thanx .